Idle Thoughts of a Wandering Mind
1) I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it.
2) I had amnesia once---or twice.
3) I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart. Now what?
4) Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were catholic.
5) All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
6) If the world were a logical place, Men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
7) What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
8) They told me that I was gullible and I believed them.
9) Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.
10) Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
11) One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people.
12) My weight is perfect for my height--which varies.
13) I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
14) The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
15) How can there be self-help "groups"?
16) If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
Idle Thoughts of a Wandering Mind
1) I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now
I don't know what to feed it.
2) I had amnesia once---or twice.
3) I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart.
Now what?
4) Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were
catholic.
5) All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't
make me happy.
6) If the world were a logical place, Men would be
the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
7) What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
8) They told me that I was gullible and I believed them.
9) Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the
home and, when he grows up, he'll never be
able to merge his car onto the freeway.
10) Experience is the thing you have left when
everything else is gone.
11) One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk
about other people.
12) My weight is perfect for my height--which varies.
13) I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
14) The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
15) How can there be self-help "groups"?
16) If swimming is so good for your figure, how
do you explain whales?
A youg couple got married and went on their honey moon. When they
got back the bride immediately called her mother.
"Well," said her mother,"so how was the honeymoon"
'Oh,mama,"she replied,'the honeymoon was wonderfull! So romanic!"
Suddenly she burst out crying. "But,mama as soon as we returned,
Sam started using the most horrible language--things I'd never heard
before! I mean all these awful 4-letter words! You have to take me
home...Please".
"Sarah,Sarah," her mother said,"calm down! You need to stay with your
husband and work this out. Now, tell me.what could be so awful?WHAT
4-letter words?""Please don't make me tell you mama,"I'm so
embarrassed, they're just too awful!! PLEASE COME AND GET ME!"
"Darling,baby,you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell your mother
these horrible 4-letter words.
sobbing,the bride said,"Oh Mama....he used words like: dust,wash,iron
,and cook.."
"I'll pick you up in twenty minutes,"said the mother.
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